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Deep Sea Diver

I'm calling this post "Deep Sea Diver" because it's about my experience taking scuba diving lessons, but I should let you know that Deep Sea Diver is also the name of a really, really good Seattle band.

 

Koh Tao: Scuba Diving with Big Blue

To get from Krabi to Koh Tao, we first took a 3-hour bus ride to get to the right pier, and then a speed ferry to Koh Samui, then Koh Phangan (the island where they have the crazy Full Moon parties), and then finally Koh Tao. The speed ferry ride was a little nuts; we bounced up and down on the waves like we were in a speedboat, but it was a two-story ferry that must have had about 100 people in it. The people sitting outside (on the second level) got soaking wet, and the people inside were yakking all over the place from seasickness. In fact, we all got vomit bags ahead of time because this is a pretty common occurrence on those types of boats.

When we finally got to Koh Tao around 4:30, someone from Big Blue Diving (the company I'm taking scuba diving lessons with) was there, ready to tuk-tuk us to the diving resort. Big Blue also offers free dorm lodging for people doing the 4-day Open Water Diving certification course (which is what I'd signed up for), so that's where I was staying, as well as where I'd be taking lessons.

For those that don't know (which was me, about 2 days before beginning this course), getting your Open Water Diving certification means that you are globally recognized as being qualified to do recreational scuba diving up to 30 meters deep with a buddy (you ALWAYS scuba with a buddy!) The "open water" part means that you can't go into sunken ships or caves or other enclosed underwater spaces. To qualify for that, you would need to become a "tech" diver, which is highly advanced and difficult.

The 4-day certification course includes:

- an evening of orientation videos and homework

- a half-day of skills practice in a pool

- four ocean dives (2 dives at 5 meters on the 3rd day; 2 dives at 18 meters on the 4th day).

The first night was the video orientation, and boy, did I learn a lot about what can go wrong and all the risks involved in scuba diving. For example, you can get decompression sickness from ascending if you've gone too deep for too long. You can get nitrogen narcosis when the nitrogen buildup in your body exceeds 3 parts per million, which tends to happen when you get 30 meters deep; some people actually TRY to get this, since it evokes a feeling of euphoria and is pretty easily remedied by ascending a few meters. However, it can make you pretty stupid in a dangerous way if you aren't careful. Our instructor, Ernesto, told us that once, when he was on a dive with advanced divers and had taken some eggs to play underwater ping pong with, two of the guys got nitrogen narcosis and ATE THE EGGS UNDER WATER. Eventually, they realized they weren't breathing -- as their mouths couldn't both consume eggs and be attached to their air tubes at the same time -- and they recovered, but....wow.

More things that can go wrong: lung over-expansion if you hold your breath while you ascend, and of course, something going wrong with your equipment, like your air supply running out unexpectedly, or a shark attack. Those last two are, of course, extremely rare. However, learning about all these things did remind me of an Eastern European woman I met during the Uyuni Salt Flats tour who had been in TWO severe diving accidents, which, if I remember correctly, were both related to equipment malfunction. Once we heard the story of the first diving accident, we were so surprised and impressed that she wanted to keep diving. After the second accident (which happened during the VERY NEXT DIVE she did), she decided she just couldn't do it anymore. (Yeah... no shit.) She hasn't suffered any permanent damage except some minor hearing loss, I think -- thank goodness. Anyway, her stories were in the back of my mind as I went through the training process.

In the pool the next day, we got to work with the equipment. It's pretty amazing how little equipment is needed for a human to survive for 30-60+ minutes underwater at a time, but as far as hobbies go, this one is pretty equipment-intensive ones, and I've never really been a fan of recreational activities/hobbies that requires a lot of gear. (This is why I prefer to run instead of ski or snowboard; why I am the SINGER in the band; and one of the reasons why standup comedy is awesome.) I started to think I should have opted for the Free Diving course instead, where they teach you how to dive as deep as 20 meters on a single breath. Can you imagine going snorkeling with friends and then being all, "see ya!" and diving down 15 meters like a mermaid person? That would be amazing. Also, people who do extreme free diving are insane. Check out this video of the world record holder for free-dive depth (going down 145 meters with one breath):

Insane. How can the human body survive something like that??

Anyway, I was trying to not let all the complicated bells and whistles and sheer weight of the diving equipment intimidate me from trying it out. If I loved it, dealing with all the gear would be worth it.

When we submerged ourselves into the pool, breathing only through our regulators (i.e. the mouthpiece/tubes connected to our oxygen cylinders), it felt really, really weird. At first it feels like you aren't getting enough air. The regulator breathing sounds very Darth Vader-esque, so even when you are getting plenty of oxygen, it SOUNDS like you're really working for it, and that's stressful. I don't become anxious very easily, but I was pretty uncomfortable. Also, it didn't help that I didn't use the bathroom when we had a bathroom break before getting in the pool (I didn't have to go!), and then one minute after we got in the water I had to pee. I made the underwater hand signal to the instructor that I had to use the bathroom -- which is crossing your middle and index finger and pointing down so they look like someone crossing their legs, as one does when you gotta go -- and he responded by doing that Italian chin flick thing. He meant it jokingly, of course, but also maybe not.... throughout the training, I definitely felt like he was easily irritated and inpatient, which stressed me out even more, because I felt like I couldn't be straightforward about not understanding something or just needing to urinate.

After the first half of our pool session, I was starting to have doubts about whether I wanted to continue. After the second half, however, I was feeling pretty comfortable, and excited to get into the open water. From what my scuba-certified friends have told me, the best part is getting in the deep water with the fish and other marine life, which reminds you why you wanted to do this in the first place, and provides some distraction from the constant awareness that you are not in your natural environment as an air-breathing human and all the things that could go wrong and potentially result in that most terrifying of deaths: drowning.

The next day, we got on a big scuba boat with a few other groups (the boat holds about 75 people but since it was New Year's Day, very few people were motivated to go diving), and went to our first dive spot. We geared up -- wet suits, weight belts, buoyancy vests with oxygen cylinders, masks, and fins. The straps on my buoyancy vest felt like they were coming loose really easily. One by one, we stepped into the water, and I let the instructor know about the straps, and he tightened them up and reassured me that they'd stay in place now that we were in the water.

Once everyone was in and we started paddling toward the rope for our descent, I noticed a ton of bubbles right next to me, which meant I had an air leak coming from somewhere. I shouted, "what does this mean!?" and then the other three people in my group were all shouting "your regulator!" and I had no idea what they were talking about until I pulled my backup regular out of the water and the bubbles stopped. I still didn't understand what had happened, though. The instructor swam over and checked my pressure gauge for how much air I'd lost, and I'd gone from 190 to 150 (you're supposed to start a dive between 180 and 220), so we had to go back to the boat so I could get a new cylinder. Ugh. Five minutes into the dive and I was already feeling like the problem child who needed constant help and was slowing everything down. The instructor explained to me that when the regulator is mouthpiece-up in the water, it will start releasing air, and that's what happened. I had no idea this was a thing, and it made me wonder what other seemingly basic pieces of info about HOW YOU CAN LOSE MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF AIR IN FIVE SECONDS I wasn't aware of. This was especially frustrating for me, because I had just established myself as the studious one of the group who was going to totally ace the written certification test. I was supposed to know things, and I didn't know this basic thing. Fuck.

When I strapped into the vest with the new cylinder, I had psyched myself out so much about it, I didn't even want to go anymore, and that's what I told the Big Blue employee who was helping me. He told me that mistakes happen on the first dives and it's really no big deal -- this is how you learn, after all -- but I was freaked out. Somehow, he convinced me to get back in, and things were okay. Still shaky and emotional, but basically okay.

Then we started descending down the rope into the water. I looked around and saw nothing but water in all directions around me (I had expected to be distracted by pretty fish and stuff right away), and it seemed like my mask was getting water in it, and I could feel my breath starting to get panicky. I also realized in that moment that part of what makes diving freaky is the fact that communication is really limited underwater. You have hand signals for the basics, like "I'm going up," "there's a butterfly fish," "are you okay?" "I'm okay," "how much air do you have?" "something is wrong," "I'm low on air," "I'm out of air," and "can we share your air supply?" However, you can't just signal, "Hey, I'm feeling panicky -- can you say something encouraging?" and they wouldn't be able to respond with something encouraging. So when you feel anxious right away, your only options are to just keep going deeper into the water despite the anxiety and hope that it goes away (or just be prepared to do the entire dive in a state of panic, I suppose), or go back up to the surface to talk about what's going on. I opted for the latter, and explained that I was freaking out and just didn't want to do it. Without completing all four dives, I can't get my certification.

So I began the first day of 2017 by quitting the thing I started on December 31, 2016. Solid.

I'm actually okay with this. Failure is the new success (according to some blogs and articles I've read about new corporate culture practices designed to encourage innovation and experimentation). It also feels pretty great to be true to my gut and not let my pride force me through something that just doesn't feel right. PLUS, I have enough hobbies and ambitions. I probably don't need to become a scuba diver also. I can always watch Planet Earth: Oceans episodes when I need a deep sea fix.

And at least I tried. If you don't try, you may be missing out on something you would absolutely fall in love with. Now I can also pass on the advice to all of you to do a one-day dive to see if you can handle the sensation of scuba diving, and see if it's worth it to you, before committing to a certification course.

The good news: It's not too late for me to become an Open Water Diver if I change my mind. I passed the written test, and if I complete the four dives elsewhere (e.g. in Malaysia or Indonesia) within the next six months, then I can get my SSI (Scuba Schools International) certification. At this point, I have no idea if I'll try to do that or not, but it's nice to know the option is there.

Now that I am no longer a student at Big Blue, I have lost my free lodging privileges. I'll be staying at a hostel my final night in Koh Tao, and then doing another speed ferry + bus combo to Bangkok for my final three nights in Thailand.

So that was my experience trying to become an open water scuba diver. I'm still sure that it feels wonderful to get down into the sea and see a slice of the underwater world normally hidden from most humans -- a world MUCH larger than the land of our continents. As the orientation video pointed out, we only call our planet Earth because the land is where we live; if we were being objective about what it really is, we would call it Planet Water. But I'm just not sure I'm cut out for scuba diving; when I get to Malaysia or Indonesia I may reconsider, and try to do those dives and get my certification, but if not, that's also fine.


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